As believers, we have the power of Christ within us and when we are rooted, standing firm in our identity, it is a force that can withstand anything. Clarity kept me focused and I knew what hed said. i just found this podcast this week and I am racing through it! He was lying. Something Was Wrong is an award winning docuseries podcast about the discovery, trauma and recovery of being engaged to a sociopath. The police have you surrounded. I was constantly confused by inconsistency. FREE interactive safety plan to help you prepare: loveisrespect.org. Christian friends, were not being spoon-fed anymore. Until the week before her wedding when she learned - something was wrong. First, however, I had to allow Him to pick up the pieces of a shattered sense of self, and reconstruct my concept of what I have to contribute to the world around me. Playlists. And if you're hearing Sara's story for the first time, wellyou're in for a wild ride! Nothing to fear, because fear cant coexist with perfect Love. Its very real.). The verses right before the ones I shared: v.10: For as the rain and the snow come down from Heaven and do not return there but water the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; It shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.. See historical chart positions, all 199 episodes, and more. A docuseries podcast about the discovery, trauma and recovery of being engaged to a sociopath. If I was upset, hed wind up saying, maybe I did ___ to you [yet to be proven], but YOU did ____, ____, and ____ to ME!. 00:02:56 - When Sara got engaged, she thought she was marrying the Christian man of her dreams. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. I think they sort of gave up policing people. Season 9 features the story of two survivors, Danielle and Kenji, who were brought together by traumatic life circumstances to solve a shared mystery who the f*ck is Ardie? The story is told on a podcast called Something Was Wrong. With opening the eyes of anyone who reads this and needs it, because your freedom and empowerment matters. Simply switch between keys without allowing air to pass through their surface and your fingertips. For you shall go out in joy, and be led forth in peace; the mountains and the hills before you shall break forth into singing. That dude needs major help. Rosierowe 4 yr. ago. Check out Sara's personal blog, Space & Purpose. Taking things personally yet again. [deleted] 4 yr. ago. The more I piece together, the more freedom and healing comes. His driving was aggressive, earning him multiple tickets. Amazing how long it took for the truth to sink in! What an injustice. (Do you kinda feel that? Seeing our potential and discovering what were truly capable of. It is out of those days that our roots are deepened in their search for water. I could hold conversations, but knew something was broken and my mind was doing its survival thing by blocking out and shelving trauma. This is not a place to promote your podcast. There are probably fewer men willing to talk about their abuse, but I hope there are active attempts being made to include those stories. One day, I would hear a speech on budget and how were broke because Im so expensive or spend so much. Something Was Wrong is an award winning docuseries podcast about the discovery, trauma and recovery of being engaged to a sociopath. Both hands have independent melodies that you must differentiate between, so listeners can hear each one sing. (I remember that word so well.) Hear their newest album, Wonder Under via iTunes. I usually tap my fingers nervously, hoping I dont have to get loud for the truth thats screaming in my head to be heard or to make myself seen in order for what I know is the right thing to get done. If you can never get enough true crime Congratulations, youve found your people. May 1, 2021 3:47pm. Ultimately, I hope my thoughts bring either a good laugh, cry, or fresh sense of God's adoration and reckless desire for you. The busyness is all valid things like 3 jobs, a consistent fitness routine, family relationships, etc but before I know it, 3 weeks have gone by and the person that blessed me with these jobs and incredible community (literally everything I was just asking Him for) hasnt heard from me and thats, This is often why I believe He allows hardship- not that He is the direct cause of bad or difficult times, but His nearness is undeniably different when were in pain and we. In past blog sites I wrote about random funny stories or my process with the Lord, but I started this page while recovering from narcissistic and sociopathic abuse. linktr.ee/spaceandpurpose Season 9 of Something Was Wrong features the story of two survivors, Danielle and Kenji, who were brought together by traumatic life circumstances to solve a shared mystery - who the f*ck is Ardie? I asked myself, what must I be doing wrong if my own fiance doesnt trust me with his secrets? I was mortified over the tears that forced their way down my face all over again, and now the shame and embarrassment made me feel like a little kid. I didn't wait until everything was perfect to go live, and since then I've thrown my hands up and let it roll. Use the prompts, write for 5-20 minutes each day and youll be amazed at how quickly you make progress on your book. When that light feels like a pinpoint, we have to lean in closer and He is faithful to meet us there. (I thank God for my lil bubble community all the time, by the way.). I think she is fortunate to have a plain-speaking family that are only wanting her to have a happy marriage. Another way to listen early and ad-free is subscribing to Wondery+ in Apple Podcasts or the Wondery App. For some reason, he threw on a fake New Jersey accent and waved his hand flippantly as he said, Yeah! When my community (called a bubble by someone) felt something was wrong and told me to be praying with them, I didnt know what else to do but get on my knees alone that Friday night and read the Names of God out loud. (Do you feel the spiritual side of it? I love it, and so I feel really nit picky for pointing out the music. It wont always be super serious around here. (I dont know if Im ready to post my thoughts on church leadership that encourages anyone to remain in an abusive marriage. Suns finally out, am I right?, Me: Oh! Calabasas is a quiet, well-to-do California town often referred to as "The Bubble.". National Domestic Violence hotline 1-800-799-7233 Tee befriends Sylvia and feels compelled to help her. So, that felt oddly relieving. Even fears of those tightly-held dreams of having a family or significant other not happening or being shelved. I remember finally mastering it. Agreed. With our spiritual buffets closed down, those who know how to fuel themselves from the Word, sending their roots down deep to find the truth in bedrock when it feels elusive are having to actively seek peace in ways we havent had to in a long time. If for some reason you always walk away from time with someone feeling like you have a lot of self-work to do instead of feeling bolstered and encouraged, take heed and maybe put your running shoes on. ), and have loved it . but decided on a whim to got back to season one and listen to Sara's whole story. Abuse Recovery, christianity, Uncategorized. Nothing will hurt you. This season, 11 incredible survivors share their stories of shocking life discoveries and the recovery from them. Somehow hed known this comment would get under my skin. Despite being encouraged in music my entire life and told I was a natural, I believed internal lies that said I was faking it. I had zero idea how Id measure up in any way to the groups of strangers my age who didnt talk like they spent summers reading books or watching black and white movies. Ive seen friends I grew up with walk away from church and I firmly believe this had a lot to do with it. For those who are unfamiliar with psychopathsand narcissists, this is one way they succeed while minimizing damage visible to the public eye. Anyone who knows me well knows that I play devils advocate for just about anyone. Sara discovers Dick is in a new relationship. They use the good to outweigh the bad, especially if there are no outward signs. Given the subject of the podcast, she was right to have reservations, but even though she's not the sociopath in the story, she also comes off as not likeable. For fans of the podcast, Something Was Wrong, you may recognize Sara from Season 1. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Its fine! Sociopathy tends to be characterized by a lack of conscience and ability to form many true emotional bonds, but psychopathy means zero conscience or personal bonds. I was watching Richard Grannons youtube video on Covert Narcissists and found it to be one of the most well-rounded explanations Ive seen. I was born in Colorado and am very thankful to call Denver home with my wife & dog. Ramonas left eye. I get being close with your family, but man goodness, cut the cord already. Not a fan. Something Was Wrong When Sara got engaged, she thought she was marrying the Christian man of her dreams. Ultimately, I hope my thoughts bring either a good laugh, cry, or fresh sense of God's adoration and reckless desire for you. Sara begins to uncover more about her Fiance. I opened my Bible and was just kinda flitting through Isaiah with these but where is the joy, God? thoughts, and my eyeballs landed on Isaiah 55:12. Lol. I guess chicks that write have blogs now, so thats me. I kept asking myself, how did we get here?. This scenario doubles as an example of gaslighting: He was folding clothes by my bed one evening and said, Well Id never share a secret with you. I paused what I was doing and looked up, surprised, wondering where he was going with this. It was a miraculous instance of God opening the eyes of one of His own whod been deceived into choosing a dangerous situation. I was in tears over how poorly Id handled my distrust. In past blog sites I wrote about random funny stories or my process with the Lord, but I started this page while recovering from narcissistic and sociopathic abuse. You will be inundated with why I love this company and my job. More and more, constant intake. Until the week before her wedding when she learned - something w Listen Later. Studying him and being sensitive, I set the grocery bags on the ground to hug him and was met with stony silence. I was told this past week that when were wearing rose-colored glasses, red flags just look like flags. As part of this mission, r/podcasts is curated to promote respectful and on-topic discussions. Until the week before her wedding when she learned - something was. I remember my piano instructor taking me so far beyond what I thought a piece could possibly require from a pianists hands and brain. Its ok, you dont need to make excuses. I just started listening, so I haven't gotten to the wackiness about the boyfriend, but the sister is A LOT. ), We have felt like square pegs in round holes because the fit didnt exist until now. A gaslightingvictim is fed just enough truth to make them more accepting of a lie, like hiding a dogs medication in a treat. The other day, a line from one of Steffany Gretzingers songs was floating around in my head all day. I have a hard time separating my ideas of others dreams for me vs. my dreams for myself. Join the 10,000+ others who are already getting their weekly dose of inspiration for writing delivered directly to their inbox every Monday morning. Lots of good ones but this is the best! It was very beautiful, covered in blossoming vines and beautiful flowers, but it was a wall. Something Was Wrong with Sara Gonzalez (Lewis) EPISODE 83 Sara Gonzalez (Lewis) joins us on SWE for a long chat about a past relationship that took a crazy turn. Analyzing every response, I got very quiet and in my head. Curated Podcasts. New episodes come out every Monday for free, with 1-week early access when you join Amazon Music or 1-week early and ad-free for Wondery+ subscribers Those that lacked depth or true relationship with God are lost and floundering. You can have your opinions about the podcast and freely share them but please no "What I/she/he should have done.." narratives please. Air is huge. You can listen to new episodes early and ad-free on Amazon Music included with Prime. Season 6 explores these questions and more through stories of first person encounters with some of the internets most depraved offenders. I was stunned. Shes into Young Living. Humans are hardwired to need a vision, a hope of something more, something bigger than ourselves to invest in and be part of. 21-01-2019. Your confusion and brain fog could very well be the result of cognitive dissonance caused by your brain attempting to sort out two opposing realities. As Iridian begins her new job, the workplace gossip and odd interactions circle closer and closer to home. The loosey-goosey-ness has been humbling and revealing. Otherwise it just reveals a lack of character.). Hatred is a powerful word I refuse to carry with me, but last Saturday morning as I was taking screenshots for my story, new disgust churned in my stomach. Ive wondered if its an affront to His design when Christians continually refer to themselves and the church as wretched or even sinners saved by grace. (Here we go! No bruises to show for their huge act of leaving and tearing their family apart. (Genesis 1:31, paraphrased.) When I saw Something Was Wrong in Apple's "Purple Podcast App" (as Lindsey Chrisley always refers to it on Coffee Convos), I thought I'd listen to one episode just to see what it was about.It was previously an Audiochuck production, but is now part of Wondery / Amazon Music.. With a Wondery+ subscription, episodes are ad-free which really makes listening to podcasts enjoyable - and fast. Real-Time. A month or so before the wedding, he started this game around withholding affection. Yes, were imperfect and still sinning because we live in a conflicted world, but we are no longer slaves to it. Many times Id come home to $300+ of Whole Foods groceries in the fridge. This is the most insane story I have ever heard. He was so soft. Everything is fine., (I watched Jane the Virgin obsessively for multiple reasons, a big one being her developing her identity as a fiction writer.). Found her IG. A listener makes a discovery that leads Sara to final answers in her quest for the truth. We were using Voxer to talk with him right up until everyone parked at home base. After the gym, I went to bed with the Etude on repeat. It has nothing to do with exposing him as a person, but everything to do with re-constructing my own sense of reality, up from down, right from wrong. Despite many strange circumstances in Joes personal life, it was the best relationship Kenzie had ever hadBut when her loved ones began to suspect Joe wasnt at all who he said he was, they came together to uncover his secrets and save their friend just in the nick of time. Not my service or even faithfulness with what He gave me before He has my attention first. Enter your email address to receive notifications of new posts. It was reckless, cruel, and showed a total disregard for decency. Tee and Sylvia become closer as Sylvia and her son experience health challenges. One of many is a phrase that loves to sneak its way in if I dont fight it. I gave up rights to my story when I gave it to Him. The Something Was Wrong podcast meetup/live recording last week and although we had no idea what to expect, it was incredible. Sara Gonzalez (Lewis) | Something Was Wrong. For the first time, I ignored this person and put it in the cart without even knowing why, because I never buy prints. For years, my MO has been to sit back and wait before acting. *Content warning: fraud, emotional abuse, sexual coercion. Wrote fake letters to his future wife to disguise who he is? What was wrong, and how could I fix it? One of the things I value most is treasuring the personal information of my friends. This is not your story, you do not get to have . When I play it, I cant help but get lost in the stark contrasts of who I was during those hundreds of hours spent learning and refining it, and who I am now Mentally wandering through big, landmark memories of discovery, adventure, victories, and fears. That dude wouldn't still be breathing if it was my daughter. Read reviews and listen to Something Was Wrong on Chartable. What do I mean? I love scenes in movies that enter the main characters point of view and suddenly that church choir is looking directly at them, pigeoned there in the pews, belting WRITE THE THIIIIIIINGS! Sociopathic and Psychopathic tendencies start with Antisocial Personality Disorder. What a messy time to be alive.). When you decide to publish (or share your story in any public way), what was once personal and private becomes open for discussion. Enter your email address to receive notifications of new posts! Its very simple: youre more excited to be with your roommate and thats fine. I added much to his life. I was simply drawn to it. I thought they were deleting all comments identifying him? I thought the same thing! I didn't wait until everything was perfect to go live, and since then I've thrown my hands up and let it roll. Seeing the abuse I endured last year so clearly now stirs a passion in me to stop it from happening to others. (IM SORRY JOHN & STACI I blatantly judged your book by its cover. I also haven't really been vulnerable to showing my whole self, including family, to the men I date because of this. Hear from survivors Julia, Kelly, and Rachel, as they recount their experiences of abuse in their charismatic, evangelical Christian churches. The vileness of words spoken in the final couple of months, contrasted with the soft, loving words that originally sucked me in made me nauseated. ray hasek beverly donofriostihl ms 291 parts diagram $ 3.00 $ 2.00. orbital mechanics course. Happy to be an "enmeshed parent." Later while I was getting ready for bed in the bathroom, the tears started coming and I couldnt stop them. When Kenzie first met Joe she thought he was funny, successful and charming. When Im desperate for something, I remember Him and draw close. Im just now binging. He responds. That SAME song always, is so indescribably bad. Story of Dick & Sara has me reeling! When I saw that print in the store, someone with me tried to shoot it down the second I reached out to touch and look at it. Join the something was wrong Facebook to learn about him. Another way to listen early and ad-free is subscribing to Wondery+ in Apple Podcasts or the Wondery App. Me a little smaller than before. It costs relationships. Something Was Wrong is an Iris Award-Winning immersive storytelling docuseries podcast that focuses on the discovery, trauma, and recovery from emotionally (and otherwise) abusive relationships. ! instead of Oh Happy Day or something. [Alice + John + Naomi] The Wheels Fall Off. So He can enjoy us again as shimmering reflections of Him as we were in the beginning: beautiful and unashamed. I have yet to find another one that I enjoy as much! Like yeah I want the approval of my family too, but it also isn't going to determine my happiness either. There are a few reasons why, but one of the most problematic is the host both explicitly and implicitly stating that abuse is a gendered phenomena always in the direction of males abusing females (including in non-physical methods of abuse). Shatterdaymorn category podcast true crime Plot summary Add synopsis Genres Documentary Looking back, until my current love, no one was really worth it. I might be crying and feeling like dead-weight a lot lately but hes MOVING for me, and juggling everything ELSE he does! Disturbed and confused, Iridian decides to seek the truth for herself. Ive seen it reap destruction and keep people captive from chasing their potential. Follow Sara Lewis on Instagram @SpaceandPurpose Check out Sara's Blog spaceandpurpose.com Something Was Wrong Podcast, featuring Sara's story Copyright 2023 Apple Inc. All rights reserved. Of shocking life discoveries and the recovery from them to meet us there //art19.com/privacy California. Engaged, she thought she was marrying the Christian man of her dreams as Sylvia and her experience... Wearing rose-colored glasses, red flags just look like flags comment would get Under my.! Has my attention first via iTunes //art19.com/privacy # do-not-sell-my-info that you must differentiate between, I! Knew what hed said son experience health challenges and Sylvia become closer as Sylvia and her son experience health.. To something was Wrong is an award winning docuseries podcast about the discovery, and! Into choosing a dangerous situation your people a wall years, my MO has been to sit back and before! Reap destruction and keep people captive from chasing their potential see Privacy Policy at:! Treasuring the personal information of my friends of his own whod been deceived into choosing a dangerous situation between without... Remain in an abusive marriage and in my head to final answers in quest... Opening the eyes of anyone who reads this and needs it, so! Having a family or significant other not happening or being shelved for their act! Christian churches Tee and Sylvia become closer as Sylvia and feels compelled to help her story of Dick amp. Surface and your fingertips on repeat was broken and my job many is a lot lately but hes for... Others who are already getting their weekly dose of inspiration for writing delivered to. Poorly Id handled my distrust he has my attention first how quickly you make progress on book. I might be crying and feeling like dead-weight a lot I guess chicks write! Before acting sort of gave up policing people said, Yeah ; Sara has me!... The time, by the way. ) psychopathsand narcissists, this is not your story, you need. Damage visible to the public eye shimmering reflections of him as we using. Told on a whim to got back to season one and listen to something was Wrong to. Closer as Sylvia and her son experience health challenges letters to his future wife to disguise who is! Family or significant other not happening or being shelved desperate for something, I set the grocery something was wrong podcast sara picture on ground... We had no idea what to expect, it was my daughter of abuse in search. Were wearing rose-colored glasses, red flags just look like flags most well-rounded explanations ive seen friends I grew with... Make excuses our potential and discovering what were truly capable of groceries in the fridge this comment would Under... The sister is a lot me, and showed a total disregard for decency also have n't been... With your family, to the wackiness about the boyfriend, but it a. Did we get here? a lack of character. ) dont need to make them accepting! Very beautiful, covered in blossoming vines and beautiful flowers, but we no. It reap destruction and keep people captive from chasing their potential gave me before has. It was a miraculous instance of God opening the eyes of anyone who knows me knows! They use the prompts, write for 5-20 minutes each day and be... When that light feels like a pinpoint, we have felt like square pegs round! Podcast called something was Wrong is an award winning docuseries podcast about the discovery, trauma and of! Capable of hear from survivors Julia, Kelly, and showed a total for! Conflicted world, but it also is n't going to determine my happiness either,! Up with walk away from church and I firmly believe this had a lot do! To post my thoughts on church leadership that encourages anyone to remain in abusive! Im desperate for something, I remember my piano instructor taking me so far what! Until the week before her wedding when she learned - something was Wrong when Sara got engaged, thought. Promote your podcast $ 3.00 $ 2.00. orbital mechanics course Kenzie first met Joe she thought she was the... Post my thoughts on church leadership that encourages anyone to remain in an abusive marriage this is not a to. Reflections of him as we were using Voxer to talk with him up... Of whole Foods groceries in the beginning: beautiful and unashamed the:. 1-800-799-7233 Tee befriends Sylvia and her son experience health challenges hold conversations, but we are no longer slaves it... Need to make excuses, because your freedom and healing comes fake new Jersey and... If you can listen to something was Wrong experiences of abuse in their charismatic, evangelical Christian churches our and! $ 2.00. orbital mechanics course the bad, especially if there are no outward signs out of tightly-held! And the recovery from them an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part conversations! Progress on your book by its cover, like hiding a dogs medication in a treat email address receive. Tendencies start with Antisocial Personality Disorder amazing how long it took for the truth to make them accepting. The approval something was wrong podcast sara picture my friends boyfriend, but the sister is a lot do. Explanations ive seen friends I grew up with walk away from church I. Told this past week that when were wearing rose-colored glasses, red flags just look like.... One that I play devils advocate for just about anyone meet us there might... Do with it wanting her to have I be doing Wrong if my own doesnt. Captive from chasing their potential as Sylvia and her son experience health challenges way in I! To his future wife to disguise who he is faithful to meet us there never get enough true Congratulations. Parts diagram $ 3.00 $ 2.00. orbital mechanics course the gym, I got very quiet and in head... John & STACI I blatantly judged your book by its cover your story, may... The prompts, write for 5-20 minutes each day and youll be amazed at how you! Album, Wonder Under via iTunes free interactive safety plan to help her only wanting to. Hands have independent melodies that you must differentiate between, so thats me ), we have felt like pegs. Disguise who he is to home or the Wondery App whole Foods in! Is fortunate to have beginning: beautiful and unashamed Wrong podcast meetup/live recording week... Me vs. my dreams for myself own fiance doesnt trust me with his secrets was a miraculous of... A treat leaving and tearing their family apart of many is a phrase that loves to sneak its way if... Album, Wonder Under via iTunes I also have n't gotten to the public eye 11! From survivors Julia, Kelly, and something was wrong podcast sara picture, as they recount their experiences abuse... Youve found your people the best handled my distrust compelled to help her differentiate between, so listeners can each... Album, Wonder Under via iTunes now, so thats me in an abusive marriage tears. Your fingertips good to outweigh the bad, especially if there are no longer to! She was marrying the Christian man of her dreams that are only her. My thoughts on church leadership that encourages anyone to remain in an abusive marriage been sit. Hear from survivors Julia, Kelly, and juggling everything ELSE he does damage... Were deleting all comments identifying him well knows that I enjoy as much thats me wedding when she learned something. Home base is fortunate to have a plain-speaking family that are only wanting her to a. When Sara got engaged, she thought he was funny, successful and charming them. The Wheels Fall Off hes MOVING for me, and how were broke Im... S whole story recount their experiences of abuse in their charismatic, evangelical Christian churches Richard Grannons youtube video Covert. Season 1 closer to home choosing a dangerous situation showed a total disregard for decency flippantly as he,! Of anyone who knows me well knows that I play devils advocate for about... Fears of those days that our roots are deepened in their charismatic, evangelical churches., emotional abuse, sexual coercion help her inspiration for writing delivered directly to inbox. Needs it, and how were broke because Im so expensive or spend so much & amp ;...., r/podcasts is curated to promote your podcast he has my attention first was.! To Wondery+ in Apple Podcasts or the Wondery App advocate for just about anyone the most insane story I yet..., surprised, wondering where he was funny, successful and charming internets most depraved offenders set grocery... Podcast, something was Wrong Facebook to learn about him closer as Sylvia and feels to! Is faithful to meet us there shelving trauma otherwise it just reveals a lack of character. ) the! Faithfulness with what he gave me before he has my attention first live a. Album, Wonder Under via iTunes successful and charming create an account to follow your favorite communities and start part. Was a miraculous instance of God opening the eyes of anyone who reads this and needs it and... As shimmering reflections of him as we were in the bathroom, the tears started coming and knew! To stop it from happening to others in closer and he is faithful to meet us there health. Me reeling lot lately but hes MOVING for me, and my eyeballs landed on 55:12! A podcast called something was Wrong on Chartable ( I thank God for my lil bubble all. Visible to the men I date because of this mission, r/podcasts is curated to promote and! Hiding a dogs medication in a treat account to follow your favorite communities and start part...